Three months together, the good, the bad, the ugly, guys, we made it.
The last few weeks on my new team, I have been reflecting what my first team actually stood for, who each person was and brought to the team and what ways we can take what we learned from Ohana and apply them on our current teams.
Let’s see what happened…..
Family ain’t easy. When we met at training camp, we were buzzing with the excitement of the new, the unknown, the enthusiasm of knowing THIS WAS OUR TEAM!!
The name Ohana came from Eric, and I still haven’t watched the movie “Lilo and Stitch”. If we every have an Ohana reunion after the Race, watching it has to be a must…hint hint peeps.
All summer I was missing being with my team, at training camp I couldn’t soak up enough time with them. I was thankful for being on a co-ed team, and I didn’t realize how much healing happened because I had three men on my team for three months, coming from a background of relearning how to trust men.
I have one main regret of mine. I didn’t pursue my teammates the way that I should have, the way that I wanted to be pursued. And honestly, I didn’t know how. And they showed me that thankfully.
I went into launch exhausted from the summer and just feeling like I was doing everything to hold it all together. Month one was me literally just trying to survive emotionally, and you know who was there, my team. They asked me how I was doing and what my opinion was very regularly, and even though it got kind of annoying, they were trying to seek my heart in the only way they knew how, and it made me realize how distant I really was to my own heart. How I focused on perceiving other’s emotions and opinions so often, but I was blind to my own.
Month two we lost Hudson due to him not being able to get a Chinese visa. It was a spiritual battleground. Yeshuah and I fought the enemy of lies all month as He sought out to help me heal from the deep dark wounds I was blindly hiding. And who was there? My team, they gave me space to go through this, and though I felt alone sometimes and misunderstood, they were loving me the best way that they could, and when I was able to voice my heart, they listened.
Month three called for boldness and beginning to step into the role of being a daughter of the King and fighting for my team. I felt more myself. We had Hudson back, and it was our last month together. When I was bold in obedience though I was shaking, when I just wanted company as I walked to the creek to just listen to Abba, you know who was there? My team, held me and listened the best way they could. I learned that it takes time to get to know people, and it is ok if it doesn’t happen overnight, but when you do seek people’s hearts out, it is so so much fun.
Where did the rest of Ohana grow??
Caitie, the girl who loves Minnesota and sticks up for her state even more than some Texans I know. Being the finance leader on our team, I didn’t ever hear her speak a word of complaint. In fact, I have heard more of how much she enjoyed it even though sometimes it takes a lot of walking to find the right ATMs, get the good wifi, balancing all the numbers, and making sure all that background stuff is covered so the rest of us don’t have to worry about it.
I saw you soften. Your eyes especially have more joy and peace in them more often. When you do lead and people naturally follow you because you have that strength of character. You are often quiet, but when you laugh, your whole body lights up. You value words, and you take time and effort to choose your words before you say them. You always put yourself together so professionally and nicely, thanks for giving me the daily reminder of trying to not look like a world racer when we go out in public. Remember your name meaning? Pure? Remember that you are valued not in what you have done in the past, but who you are, who He says you are. And that is His Beloved, His daughter, the chosen one was clean.
To the team that gets Caitie, everyday is an iced coffee day. She lights up talking about her students and family, especially her dad. She loves cats and dogs, so if you find any wandering or in a house, be prepared to linger a bit longer. She loves singing to music especially T Swift throwbacks and currents. And she most likely would always be up for a dance party.
Eric, the guy always willing to talk about any current sports update even if you don’t understand half the lingo. I saw you challenge yourself not just physically by your daily stretching and working out, but also spiritually by prioritizing your time with Jesus in the morning and filling your mind with knowledge from the multiple books you read, the countless sermons you listened to and the way you even started taking that and leading the team spiritually by starting up team devos and having the theological discussions that you so love and that were needed more often on the team. You led by trust. I always knew you had my back, and you created that safe place for us girls to be ourselves with you, but you even started opening up and being vulnerable with the team and sharing some of your struggles. You have grown so much, and you are not the same man you were five months ago. Keep pressing into him ever and always ruling in the authority He has given to you. PS thanks for all the random daily nicknames.
To the team that gets Eric, he LOVES peanut M&Ms and usually has a stash of them in the freezer pretty consistently, so if he does, he also likes pistachios. He isn’t a big sweet person besides that. If you like sports, he is always keeping up with them. Random LOTR and HP quotes are a thing. Engage in his theological discussions, He loves it as well as challenging people’s opinions. Prob not the best idea to keep him cooped up very long, he needs to get out and do things to feel useful.
Hudson, when you said you were a 2 on the enneagram, you weren’t lying. You love loving people almost to a fault of forgetting to love yourself. You became our favorite note taker, our dancer, our empathizer, the best noise maker when eating food, the guy with at least four journals, and the kid tree. You tried your best to find ways to love each of us and get to know us though it was stinking hard so many times, but your questions are some of the best at truly helping people find the real answers. You know who you are, why you are here, and how you can help and you GO FOR IT.
To the team that gets Hudson, chocolate and hugs. Period. Exclamation point. Need I say more? Ok, he usually asks “what do you need?”. This is his way of loving you, by doing things for you, LET HIM LOVE YOU, otherwise he doesn’t feel very appreciated. Also, ask him what he needs. He gets so focussed on serving other people that he gets worn out and feels selfish to ask for help so push him if he won’t let you help him.
Jo, the one with her emotions on her sleeve and listening to a new favorite musical on repeat.
Funny how I said in the last Ohana blog telling you not to be afraid to cry, and you are now most certainly not anywhere. I love it. You love people gently, not forcing it on them, but letting them have that foundation of trust first. That is a leader quality and I am excited to see you use that gift and grow it even more. Just like your name, you give people the grace that they need.
To the team that gets Jo, she loves being awkward, so if you don’t, get used to it, she’s a natural and it is hilarious. She loves hugs, don’t make her be the first to give them; she’ll take them all. Also, playing with hair is most definitely a love language. Chocolate and chickens (not the meat, the “cute” animal”) are will also make her melt into a cute puddle of joy and childlike giddiness. Prob not the best idea to ask her about environmental stuff unless you want to see her fire up the cannons.
TJ, you stepped out big. You were the power in the silence. You saw what we didn’t and obeyed Abba to step into roles you were uncomfortable stepping into but were necessary for the team. You grew in being vulnerable when things hurt and sharing that with the team so that we could better understand you. You were always there to just listen and give advice IF we wanted it.
To the team that gets TJ, he can’t stay in the house very long. So help him get out and doing things. He loves cats and dogs too, so if you want to see more of his loving side come out, bring him some animals. He will also be that person that will ask if you want company going to the store or running errands. He enjoys it. Don’t force him to be vulnerable or overly check in on him. He is naturally a bit quiet being a perceiver, and likes his space. Also, if you like the smell of axe, you will have the privilege to get to smell it a lot. He also can secretly play the guitar and he can swing dance now…
To everything there is a season, it was a very blessed one Ohana because Abba was with us through it all.
